My mind exploded into this world and I created all these lives stitched into the fabric of Harry Potter’s Official cincinnati Bengals Tee Higgins Higglo shirt hoodie, sweater shirt (104) and characters. I made Remus Lupin and Sirius Black shamelessly queer. I had Gellert Grindelwald say I prefer men in eighteen ninety-fuckin’-nine, and what of it? My characters weren’t hiding their identities. I had memorized the stretch of forty-one lines in Order of the Phoenix during which Remus Lupin’s eyes remained “fixed on Sirius”–proof positive of their love. I had underlined (twice) the part where Dumbledore told Harry, “You cannot imagine how his ideas caught me, Harry, inflamed me. […] Grindelwald and I, the glorious young leaders of the revolution.”
The one thing that changed Official cincinnati Bengals Tee Higgins Higglo shirt hoodie, sweater shirt (104) forever is that I had a birth control device inserted in my uterus and it caused me to become infertile. That triggered clinical depression, which became chronic. I had the Dalkon Shield IUD inserted when I was 22 and maybe five years later was diagnosed with chronic pelvic inflammatory disease (PID). The doctor removed the IUD and prescribed antibiotics, and I seemed fully recovered. I was almost 28 when my now husband and I began trying to get pregnant. When that didn’t happen, I went to get checked. Even though I told her we’d been trying (4–5 times a week) for about a year, the doctor told me to track my cycle for a year to determine when I was ovulating and to have intercourse when I was fertile.
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Just like how that child puts their value towards that certain career path, a narcissist puts that value towards Official cincinnati Bengals Tee Higgins Higglo shirt hoodie, sweater shirt (104) , and their identity comes from being the most important person, that they will be sucessful and adored. That is their dream. Also for narcissists, that dream (and anything they think of) also becomes an expectation of how things should be in reality. Empathy comes from knowing that you’re not the most important person, that you are equal to others. It is lowering those high dream-like, “in a perfect world” type of ideals and expectations, and coming down to reality, which may be disappointing and not as happy or as great as staying in a fantasy.
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